Cupcakes....

Today I made cupcakes for my brother-in-law and mother-in-law. We are going to the lake tomorrow for their birthdays. Here are a few shots. The flowers turned out pretty nice. It was my first time doing fondant flowers and using luster dust. They were strawberry cupcakes with buttercream frosting.

The triathlon cupcakes really are sad. =( They did not taste good on top of that. They were chocolate cupcakes with peanut butter buttercream frosting. The frosting tasted good but the cake part....too cakey and dry. Looking for a new chocolate cupcake recipe!! If you have one please share it!!

I also went to a baby shower today. A friend of mine had her baby early. She was not due yet but she weighed in over 2lbs. She is doing great though. Her sister was born that early too due to high blood pressure. I saw pics of her and her daddy's wedding band fit on her upper arm. She is a beautiful little thing......named Preslee. I cannot wait to meet her in person. They feel she will be home in a few weeks. She needs to weigh around 5 lbs.

Clara was a hit at the shower as usual. Everyone is always so taken with her. She was personally asked to attend. Robin had not seen her since her welcome home shower. Was she in for a shock...Clara looks like she is 1 year old!! =D She was her precious little self if I do say so myself. Clara had time with her big girl cup today and she did great. I guess I am hesitant for my little baby to be a toddler. It is going by way too quickly!!!

There are somedays I think a 4th child would be fantastic!! Clay is definitely not there yet and there are somedays I wonder what I am thinking....=) I just adore my children and cherish every second I get to spend with them. We will see what God has in store for us. If this is my complete family I am 100% pleased and blessed beyond measure with that.

Sorry so long....

Well, I have just not made time to update the blog. Where do I start? Clara had her first overnighter with the boys at their meemaw & pawpaw's house last Friday. It went very well and meemaw was exhausted after all was said and done. This was a test run for when Clay and I go on a business trip to Florida this Saturday for 4 days. This is going to be extremely tough for me!! I know it is great to have Clara spend quality time with my parents as the boys have done. This is why the boys have such a wonderful relationship with them. I want Clara and them to have that same great bond. It is just harder to share this go around as compared to when I was younger.

I have included a little video of Clara in her bath. She has already gottne too big for it. She really loves the water which will be important in this family...we all thrive in the pool and lake!! I cannot wait to get her in the pool and also take boat rides. She is going to love it as will we all just watching her!!!

Thursday was Valentines Day and we had a great one. The kids and I made Valentines cookies for Clay and we had dinner at Outback and then ice cream from Shakes and a movie later at the house. It was a nice evening. Here is a pic of the boys with their chocolate candy. I figure Clara will get her box of chocolates next year and we will haev a pic of all three with the boys teaching Clara how to dig in!!!

I had a tough phone call with Tierra on Sunday. I called to check that she had gotten the videos and pictures I had sent. She had. I could tell in her voice that she was not okay. She ended up asking me to save up all the videos and pictures of Clara to give her in a year or so. She stated that it was too tough to see Clara right now. This was devastating to me at first. I completely understood where she was coming from but that openness had been very important to me. I do realize though that it is not about me and I will just make a HUGE box for her next Christmas which Tierra mentioned could be her Christmas present. This took me a few days to swallow. Never in a lifetime do I ever want to do anything that might hurt Tierra or make her uncomfortable in any way. I do thank God that she felt open enough to share this with me. It was just hard to swallow at first. I am getting better with it each day. I so much want her here to share every breath, new sound, new look, discovering her beautiful hair with her perfect little hands, etc. There is still that guilt that I have the honor of watching Clara grow into the wonderful Christian God wants her to be while Tierra is missing it here in this lifetime.

Trying too much in one day

Do you ever have one/or many of those days where you get the energy to do what you want and then there is just too much to do?? Today was one of those days. I had so many things I wanted to get done and I did get a lot done, but in my mind had a lot more I wanted to do. We got school completed, the house straightened, laundry, laundry, laundry, and got it put away pretty well, cleaned Cullen's room out and threw out a garbage bag of stuff and got over another garbage bag of clothes to give away. He now can store his "stuff" away nicely and I tried to find a place for most. I also got dinner ready for all of us and a package to send off to Tierra. I then could not find her address. Now how messed up is that to lose her address. I tried to call her and she was not at home. I really gave my self grief over losing her address. I am sure it is here somewhere but b/c of my disorganization I thought it would be easier to call and ask. I am going to store it in the computer now....then it cannot walk away. Is that sad???

Clara is growing so quickly. I just weighed her while ago and if it is right she is at around 14 lbs!!! She has more than doubled her weight of 6 lbs 14 oz. Geeez!!! She is absolutely the light of my life and the rest of the family's as well. The boys are just in love and Clay is just head over hills!!! I ordered some hair products and they finally came in for her. I got Carol's Daughter for her. So far I am really pleased but I like the Tui scent better than some of the other stuff I got. I bought the Saturday Morning set. It has a bit of everything in it. Her hair is just growing away!!! I am trying to get prepared to care for it. I think her hair texture is chaning sooner rather than later. I am going to try and add a clip of her talking to me.

Some days are tough to get over mourning for Tierra!! I got a package ready to send off to her and I just have this guilt that really gets to me. There is so much in me that wants her to be enjoying every breath she takes right along with me; every sound, cry, smile, coo, every extra ounce she puts on. I have read this is common in adoptive mothers but I guess I did not expect to feel this way sometimes. I know God has a plan and there is no doubt in my mind Clara is a HUGE part of this family and growing it stronger every day, but I cannot help but grieve for Tierra's loss. I wonder if I am checking in enough with them and then when I do I wonder if I am bothering her. I miss them dearly.....

On a lighter note, school is just really going well with the kids. I am amazed at what they are learning. It is a fantastic privilege to watch my boys learn about plant and animal cells, start enjoy reading, learning to read, and excel!! They are really growing into fantastic young men and I look forward to every day in seeing who God is molding them into being. I cannot wait for Clara to be soaking it all up too....wait a minute...she is soaking up every little thing. She watches EVERYTHING!!! She could tell you every bump in the ceiling, every window, loves looking at the dogs when they come up to her and say Hi. She almost every time the boys approach her. It is truly amazing to watch!! I would never have dreamed God could make my life so rich!!!

New Clara pics...post placement visit

Well, I tried to save some money and take some baby photos myself. I like the pics but they are definitely not professional quality, or "Michelle" quality as she has taken our family pictures. She is absolutely wonderful!! Her website is http://home.joimail.com/~picturethis/ Her business name is Picture This Creative Photography by Michele Jones.

I really love photography and would love to some day be able to take "professional" quality pictures and have some realy creativity behind it. I do have to admit with Clara it is really impossible to take a bad picture...if I say so myself. I just don't have all the equipment I would like to have or the imagination/creativity. Hopefully my eye and knowledge will grow and I can get better and better. I am going to try practicing a LOT!

We had our first out of 2 post placement visits for finalizing our adoption of Clara. It went well and I just love talking about her and how things are going. She is doing absolutely wonderul. She is a true joy and an even bigger blessing than we could have ever dreamed. We all love her so much!!! I am so grateful for adoption!! It is a blessing and I truly admire Tierra every time I look at Clara's face. How can I ever thank her enough!!! I really don't think she will ever know what she has done for our family and what a huge part in every day of our lives she plays a role in. I miss them and my heart hurts for her many times a day. I continue to pray for them and will continuously and ALWAYS!! I look forward to the day we can all get together again and rejoice again in the option of adoption!!!

Playing Catch up...

I have been trying to post forever and just never finished it...We had a great weekend. Cindy and Donna gave me a wonderful baby shower to celebrate Clara being with us. It turned out absolutely wonderful!! My good friend, Melynda, and her dog, Darby, came in too and was able to be at the baby shower and spend the night and celebrate Cullen's 8th birthday party with us. It was truly wonderful to get to spend some time with her. It had been 3 years or so.

Last night we were able to go to dinner with my grandmother, uncle, his 2 girls, and his new granddaughter, and my parents. It was nice to get to meet Sara Marie . She is just 1 week younger than Clara at 6 weeks old. It was nice getting to meet her. We will not see her often as Melissa lives farther away. She is also legally blind so it makes it tough for her to just pop in for a visit. We were very pleased and honored to have met her. I look forward to watching Clara and Sara grow up together.

Day before the adventure

Well, today has gone quickly. I freaked out a few times as far as trying to have every little detail taken care of. I am calmer now. I got ultrasound pictures of the baby in the mail today. The bottom pic is of her profile with a fist. The top pic, I have been told, is informing that she is a girl. For the life of me I cannot figure out that picture. I am pretty good at ultrasound pics too. How awesome to think that this might be our daughter that we will meet on Monday!! WOW!!
We talked to "T" tonight on the phone. She has found a government apartment that sounds really great for her. She thanked us for the prayers and felt that that was the reason it had all worked out. She has a doctor's appointment tomorrow and we will talk again with her as we are on the road to Utah. I cannot express all the feelings that I have at the moment. They are all bottled together as one anxiously, excited, optimistic, skeptical, faithful, etc. bubble welling up in the pit of my stomach. As I sit and think about this all, I imagine that in one week we will know if we have met our daughter or if we are heading back home empty handed again. Even though we might leave empty handed, God has great plans and I know that He will see us through this. He has been so faithful in holding our hands every step of the way and I pray that we continue to allow Him to work so wonderfully in our lives. Please keep us in your prayers as we travel through this weekend and again on Sunday as we hopefully meet "T" and her kiddoes. I dream that we can be everything that she wants for her child and more!!! God will equip us through this journey of life!! What a magnificent job He has already done! Keep it up Big Guy!! =D

Getting Ready

Today started off pretty much as usual....running late. We got started on school later than usual. This always causes some chaos. We were using BJU satllite but had the most difficult time finding a DVR that could handle the workload of recording and burning DVD's. We have now just sucked it up and bought the DVD curriculum. It is such a relief to know I do not have to record classes and then make sure I get them burned on DVD before our DVR breaks down AGAIN!! It broke down 4 times. It was way too much stress wondering where I was going to get my classes because when the DVR went down so did the hardrive saving all my classes that I had recorded. Here are a couple pics of the boys doing their schoolwork.












We are still planning on leaving for Utah this Friday to bring home our baby girl. I started to get a little freaked out about traveling back from Utah by myself with 3 kids without navigation. I pictured an unhappy baby, fighting brothers, fumbling with a map, trying to talk to Clay on the cell phone while trying to figure out where I was, etc. Then I started thinking about the time I drove for an hour in the wrong direction before I started to question whether I was going in the wrong direction or not. Yes, I said question. I was not even 100% sure if I was going wrong or not and I mean completely and totally the wrong direction. I was supposed to be going north and I was going south for a complete hour before noticing something did not seem right. Then, after calling Clay, I was pointed in the right direction. So I am happy to announce that I bought a Garmin C330 tonight. WooHoo!! (I think I remembered the name of that thing.) I have a question for ya too.....Are you really lost if you don't realize you are lost??