Thursday, January 24, 2008

Trying too much in one day

Do you ever have one/or many of those days where you get the energy to do what you want and then there is just too much to do?? Today was one of those days. I had so many things I wanted to get done and I did get a lot done, but in my mind had a lot more I wanted to do. We got school completed, the house straightened, laundry, laundry, laundry, and got it put away pretty well, cleaned Cullen's room out and threw out a garbage bag of stuff and got over another garbage bag of clothes to give away. He now can store his "stuff" away nicely and I tried to find a place for most. I also got dinner ready for all of us and a package to send off to Tierra. I then could not find her address. Now how messed up is that to lose her address. I tried to call her and she was not at home. I really gave my self grief over losing her address. I am sure it is here somewhere but b/c of my disorganization I thought it would be easier to call and ask. I am going to store it in the computer now....then it cannot walk away. Is that sad???

Clara is growing so quickly. I just weighed her while ago and if it is right she is at around 14 lbs!!! She has more than doubled her weight of 6 lbs 14 oz. Geeez!!! She is absolutely the light of my life and the rest of the family's as well. The boys are just in love and Clay is just head over hills!!! I ordered some hair products and they finally came in for her. I got Carol's Daughter for her. So far I am really pleased but I like the Tui scent better than some of the other stuff I got. I bought the Saturday Morning set. It has a bit of everything in it. Her hair is just growing away!!! I am trying to get prepared to care for it. I think her hair texture is chaning sooner rather than later. I am going to try and add a clip of her talking to me.

Some days are tough to get over mourning for Tierra!! I got a package ready to send off to her and I just have this guilt that really gets to me. There is so much in me that wants her to be enjoying every breath she takes right along with me; every sound, cry, smile, coo, every extra ounce she puts on. I have read this is common in adoptive mothers but I guess I did not expect to feel this way sometimes. I know God has a plan and there is no doubt in my mind Clara is a HUGE part of this family and growing it stronger every day, but I cannot help but grieve for Tierra's loss. I wonder if I am checking in enough with them and then when I do I wonder if I am bothering her. I miss them dearly.....

On a lighter note, school is just really going well with the kids. I am amazed at what they are learning. It is a fantastic privilege to watch my boys learn about plant and animal cells, start enjoy reading, learning to read, and excel!! They are really growing into fantastic young men and I look forward to every day in seeing who God is molding them into being. I cannot wait for Clara to be soaking it all up too....wait a minute...she is soaking up every little thing. She watches EVERYTHING!!! She could tell you every bump in the ceiling, every window, loves looking at the dogs when they come up to her and say Hi. She almost every time the boys approach her. It is truly amazing to watch!! I would never have dreamed God could make my life so rich!!!

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Oh my gosh, that was a great video clip!! She is so alert...not to mention gorgeous!!

Have a nice weekend!