Since Clara's first birthday is quickly approaching I felt the need to look back through my posts and to my amazement it was one year ago to today's date that I started my blog. I read through the posts and I don't know if it is just my emotions all wound up but I was just crying. I was remembering back to the first posts and all that was going on at that time. There were so many emotions wrapped up in the preparation of our daughter's arrival. Prior to being picked by Tierra we had a failed placement. We were blessed with the company of a little girl that had been named Denaya for 3 days. (thus Clara's middle name of Denae. We named her after the trials we went through during the adoption process and grew us to be stronger people) Louisiana law is a 5-day waiting period for the birthmom to change her mind. Another family had backed out on baby Denaya and we were called on the spur of the moment to parent Denaya. We packed up and traveled through the night to meet with them in the morning. We cared for Baby Denaya for 3 days and her birthmom, mom, changed her mind on the 6th day. It was a devastating blow. We met Denaya's mom and by appearance she was a broken woman. She was living at home with 2 other children and we had been told it was not a "safe" situation. It also took her 6 hours to find a ride to pick up Denaya while we waited for her in a hotel lobby the whole time. To say the least I was heartbroken for that woman and I was terrified for Baby Denaya's future. I have thought of her often and pray for her family. I thought of them during the hurricane and prayed that they were safe and had a place to stay. I did have peace of mind that God had a plan and knew He had someone made specifically for our family and us for her.
When we got the call we had been chosen it was the most terrifying and wonderful moment bound up together. Then, when a letter that Tierra had written was shared with us we knew that was the woman we had prayed for. We had prayed that we would have a strong woman to tell our daughter about and hopefully one day our daughter would meet. She was strong, smart, loving, caring and loved her baby very much. She loved her so much in fact that she was aware that her situation was not the best to bring her into and that she had to make the best life she could for the family she already had. She was very much aware that she was blessing another family with this wonderful little life.
My blog started on November 11, 2007, when we were planning our trip to Utah. So much has happened in the past year. God is truly amazing and His blessings abound. As Clara's first birthday quickly approaches it is bittersweet. We love this little girl, our daughter, with all of our spirit and soul, but I am very much aware that her physical presence is very much missed by Tierra and her family. I am praying for you guys during this tough time You guys are always in my thoughts. Together we celebrate this wonderful little life, this wonderful little miracle, our little Treasure!!
I am thankful for technology and the fact that I can record and share our life through this blog with those that are far away. I am thankful for those that can peek in and see how fast our Treasure is growing. When you guys have time (or want to spend some time looking back) just click the side bar to see where this blog started from.
Happy 1st Birthday Blog!
Paul, Apostle of Christ
17 hours ago